The Psychology of Dance

While I have quite a number of other topics of which to write, apparently my blog post about using the Barre for fitness struck a note, and it has also received the highest number of tweets of any single blogpost since I started this website in October 2009. It seems like the perfect segueway to talk about one of my favorite topics, the psychology of Dance. Not only is there an excellent book by the same title, but also it is a subject that connects with many of us, even if we’re not professional Company dancers.

What is your psychology of dance?

When it comes to the world of dance, and the depth there is within it, the psychology involved goes well beyond tutus, toe shoes, and hours of practice. If you take dance classes for longer than a few months of a year, you’re likely to build a connection with your instructor, co-instructors, fellow students, and the web of relationships and experiences each one of these people bring with them. After coaching and counseling artists and being a performance artist myself with professional dancers, musicians, actors, and actresses, it’s fair to say that we all come with our wounds, hopes, areas of strength, and emotional flaws. I’ve seen terrific dancers choke on a performance they know like the back of their hand. Musicians with tremendous skill can yell at another musician after committing an embarrassing mistake. Loved ones can criticize their spouses, sons, or daughters for not being perfect after all the hours given to practice, or sacrifices they have also experienced by supporting an artist. Don’t let me forget these others behaviors: cat fights, gossip, bullying, self-entitlement, stealing, complaining, and tattling. It’s enough to make you wince from time to time, and yet most of us from the inside of this world will tell you that we love what we do so much, we’re willing to tolerate and rise above most of these unpleasantries for the opportunity to develop ourselves in character as well as on the stage.

However, I have a big bone to pick when it comes to women and rivalry. I’ve written on the subject before (and I may repost the original article here shortly), and many of you who know me personally have already heard me wax on about the lengths some women have gone to in order to work out issues of deep insecurity and jealousy inspired by competition with other women, both on the dance floor and off. The world of dance, combined with a competitive spirit, has fueled some of the worst rivalries and damage to friendships that make some divorces look tame in comparison. While the dance world can also inspire tremendous creativity, joy, and fulfillment, no one who is honest with what they see can deny that like any other corporation, the dance Company also strugggles with issues of narcissism, jealousy, abuses of power, moments of paranoia, and paternalism.

Why do some artists become divas?

Why does dance appear to encourage (read: not cause) such nasty behavior among some (not all) women? Well, let’s review a few elements that end up being a part of a realistic picture of the typical performance artist’s life:

1. Competition for limited jobs/gigs/dance companies. Not everyone rises to the top.
2. Body image issues. Our society is focused on beauty. Dancers often struggle with their self-concept, and a dance environment can be filled with gossip about weight, appearance, breast size, age, etc.
3. Money. Unless a dancer is paid a good wage for the work, it’s not common for dancers to live primarily on an income derived solely from their art. A lower income is associated with poor access to health care, nutritional issues, lack of sleep from anxiety, or the need to take an additional job to make ends meet.
4. Identity. For some dancers, their identity becomes deeply enmeshed with what it is they do, i.e. dance. If anything interferes with their ability to dance, they can become upset, express feelings of loss, and may unconsciously project their issues in other areas of their life and close relationships.
5. Timeline and lifestyle. Some professional dancers must make difficult choices about delaying what would otherwise be age-appropriate experiences, such as having a normal romantic relationships or dating life, lazy weekends and social schedules, and bearing children. This is similar to other performance-oriented careers. I once spoke to a tennis star who was applying to a masters degree program much later than others he knew, because he had to put his education plans on hold while he was most active on the circuit. While his friends could enjoy a hotdog at a baseball game, his manager was there to remind him that he would not be eating the same food, and pulled out a take-out box of carefully prepared food appropriate for an athlete.

None of the above forces a person to become a diva, or to be so competitive with others that they forget their manners. What I find is that just a few choose to become divas, based on their personal history, circumstances, and the ways they have integrated the treatment of others over the years. Divas aren’t born overnight, in most cases. They are somewhat dormant until enough narcissistic insults occur, awakening and activating that response in the person. A cascade of behaviors follow, with one very important reinforcer: everyone gives that person what she wants (i.e. the gigs, power, control, reputation, etc). In order to avoid conflict, many well-meaning people allow the diva to develop his/her diva behavior without much negative consequence. Voila, a diva is born, and in some cases, we created her.

Let me be clear: for the sheer numbers of people who dance, there are very few real divas among them. At the same time, it’s a bit of a no-brainer that for those few to rise to the top, it requires a certain mindset to get there, and that mindset tends to include a high number of those elements that we would describe as competitive, ambitious, self-absorbed, driven, demanding, and aggressive behaviors. I would say the same thing for the majority of Social Media pundits and web celebrities, and anyone who achieves a high level of success.

For now, I stand behind my statement in the original post that Barre fitness oriented classes allow people to have the fitness benefits of a ballet class without the humiliation, diva behavior, or smelly feet. It was intended to poke fun at a world of professional dance that very few get to experience, and yes, it was meant to be funny, not insulting. For those who reach a high level of achievement in ballet dance, I tip my hat in deep respect to the incredible life you get to live, and we get to vicariously enjoy through your performances. But not everyone wants to actually live your dancer’s life, and that should be OK with you. Letting others touch a piece of it through their bodies in the form of a Barre method fitness class, Yoga, Pilates, or other free-form movement classes, is a gift because no matter how much technology we throw into our worlds, there is no replacement for bodily sensation, for the warm current of our blood and breath flowing through us when we learn to move in new ways.

Note: I welcome any and all well-written comments of response to this blog, and I assure my readers that your comments will be posted as long as they are free of expletives, hate speech, misogyny, or are just plain dumb.

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